Grant Pardee

Grant Pardee

Contact: grantpardee@gmail.com

Writer | Producer | Comedian

  • 106
    stories
  • 61K
    words
106
stories for
10
publications
Grant Pardee's stories for
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McSweeney's

If Right-Wing Catchphrases Were In '90s Movies

Humor
“Do I make you triggered, baby? Do I?”

“A, B, C. Always Be Cucking.”

“I’m White Knight of the world!”

Screen shot 2016 04 02 at 8.45.54 pm article
McSweeney's

Boat Parts or Names of Unvaccinated Children?

Humor
1. Hopper 2. Tiller 3. Dashiell 4. Stanchion 5. Anais 6. Talullah

Screen shot 2016 04 02 at 8.45.54 pm article
McSweeney's

Today’s Top Puppy Pictures.

Humor
In a sun-soaked patch of bright yellow tulips, the dark Tri Beagle perches precariously on the edge of a wooden barrel.

Screen shot 2016 04 02 at 8.45.54 pm article
McSweeney's

A Sneak Preview of the 2015 Dads in Recliners Calendar.

Humor
JANUARY
George, 58, sleeps with his hands folded on his belly in a barley Owen PowerReclineXR Reclina-Rocker Recliner

Screen shot 2016 04 02 at 8.45.54 pm article
McSweeney's

Your Coworker Dave's Recent Contributions, Ranked By Effectiveness

Humor
1. Reminding everyone that he’s “super swamped,” although with what, exactly, remains a mystery.